Knowing When to Give Up

2009-September-11th

One of the things I struggle with on a fairly regular basis is the question of when I need to give up on a certain endeavor. Tonight’s admission on my part is that there is a certain point at which I simply don’t need or want to continue pursuing a minor.

What this means is that I’m going to go ahead and drop my German class. I hate to say it, but this would be my 7th year studying German, and I have very little to show for it. I haven’t been to Germany, I don’t intend to go because I don’t want to pack up my things and then reapply for my own job.

The other thing, the more immediate problem, is that while I am capable of this German work, it doesn’t fit very well with the rest of my schedule. The class is on north campus directly after a class on south campus. Added to that, I had a lot of other work to do, and some of the non-school pressures, such as the flood in my room and some money issues I’ve had this year so far.

The people I asked about it, especially Deanna, seemed okay with it. With the German class I had 15 credits, which I knew ahead of time was going to have a hard time dealing with all of the homework. Essentially, it was going to destroy me a bit more than the normal workload I’ve had has been.

And so with German out of the way, I am renewed in my efforts to do my best in acounting, computer and other classes that I need to take.

It’s definitely an interesting change in the way I’ve been operating in the past year, since I figured the whole Myasthenia Gravis thing out. Since then, I have dropped two classes that I haven’t been able to do, and there have been various other compromises I’ve made. It’s just a matter of knowing, as the somewhat well-known chant goes, about having the wisdom to know what I can change (or in my case, what I can do.) Then, having the courage to change that which I can (or in my case, to do what I can do), as well as the wisdom to know the difference. In this case, that means the wisdom to know the difference between something I can do (accounting, walking at a certain speed) and something I can’t (climbing onto the bus, making the FCB-BAA walk in just 20 minutes, etc.)

When will it be that I gain the power of making that distinction more easily? I can’t really tell, especially as it starts to become crunch time for me, in terms of the distinction between being and not being able to pay to come to the university for a few extra years, but that’s another matter entirely.